Spirit Day

Today is Spirit Day. Spirit Day, for those of you who don’t want to click the link I left back there, is basically a day to remember those who have lost their lives due to bullying and to promote the end of bullying. It originally started in 2010 to support the LGBT youth who were committing suicide because they were bullied.

And I full heartedly support Spirit Day. I was bullied as a child. I had books thrown at my head, was told I had no friends because I was fat, was made fun of left and right. I was also a bully. I will fully admit to it. I never physically bullied anyone, but I called kids names. I also had a very good mother who helped me curb my feelings into something positive and I became the good person I am today.

Yes, I believe that bullying is wrong. When it’s physical, when it’s done in more than just a playful way, when it drives people to kill themselves. But I also believe that bullying is part of growing up. It happens.

Here’s  my big point of the post:


It doesn’t make you a better person to call a bully a coward. To make THEM feel lower than the low.

Don’t believe me?

I found this comment on an article-type thing about how wrong they think bullying is: “Bullies are cruel. Somebody should show them how to behave right, because obviously their parents didn’t have time to teach them manners.” This comment was made by Natalie on Oct. 10, 2012 @ 1:49am. If I knew how to open up just the one comment on that site, I would have, so sorry that you’ll have to search a little for it, but it’s honestly only a little farther down. That picture is also kind of mean, but whatever. Art is art is art.

Another quote by some lady I’ve never heard of but come up on quote gathering pages, her name is  Anna Julia Cooper (and from the looks of her other quotes, she doesn’t seem very nice at all). Here’s her quote: “Bullies are always cowards at heart and may be credited with a pretty safe instinct in scenting their prey.”

Even Sarah Silverman tweeted “Fun fact: Cowards aren’t always bullies but bullies are always cowards.”

Tell me, what is the difference between what these people, and countless others, are saying and what bullies say? Is it because bullies pick on the people the world deems as the weak?

There is no difference. Now you’re just being mean.

So, next time you see someone picking on someone else, don’t just run up and defend the little guy. Help the bully. Help them understand and direct their confidence (because that’s why they do it, I have the studies to prove it) towards something better. Help both parties, don’t help one and shame the other.

Because words hurt. They hurt everyone.

6 thoughts on “Spirit Day

  1. Why doesn’t it surprise me that you’ve chosen on Spirit Day to champion for the perpetrators of the crime of bullying? Bullies are cowards. And, yes, bullies do go after the weak, the defenseless, or the scared because they’re easy targets. How many times did we hear growing up that we were only being bullied because we’re too fat, too ugly, too stupid, or too smart? Like it was something that we asked for, but that’s the big excuse. But, there are so many different excuses now for the common every day bully to choose from to explain why they do what they do and why its okay! For instance, nowadays being a bully is okay if you have low self esteem, bad grades, a weight problem, or any of the buzz words like ADHD of PTSD! Hey, you could go farther and give the bully a free pass to bully because he/ she happened to get a bad hair cut one day and was…I don’t know, so sad or sensitive about it and lead to the punching of innocents?

    Bullies need to be protected? Not so much!

    Parents of bullies need to teach them better; make them grow, and instill in them qualities like empathy, understanding, common decency, and other human feelings. We are all entitled to our opinions, but this is simple: The sky is blue, the grass is green, and bullying is always wrong.
    Doesn’t matter what label you try to put on it, sweety! I read your post, Jasmine, and had to laugh- some things NEVER change!

    • You’re weak. You’re a coward. You’re parents don’t love you. You’re stupid. No one likes you. You think like that? Ha! How stupid!

      … Who am I talking to here? The “weak” kid, or the “bully”? You can’t tell, can you?

      I didn’t say that bullying is right(I said it was a part of growing up). I said that it doesn’t matter who you are, you should not bully, no matter what. Words hurt people, bullies and non-bullies alike.

      I also never said to give the bully a free pass. I said to help the bully channel what they’re doing into something more positive. Don’t just dismiss them and tell them they’re horrible. No one learns anything by being told they’re horrible. HELP them be better.

      Judging by your comment, you’re just as big a bully as I am. Least I can own up to it and would actually try to help someone rather than just criticize them.

      • After taking some time to work it over I’ve come to this conclusion. You are a very big child, a bully, and may even need to take your own words of advice on the situation- if this is how you redirect your confidence I’d say you should try again for something a little less like your attempt at a verbal beat down. I find it odd that during your little speech you admit to being a bully still, even open your comment with abuse towards me, and then claim that I’m as big a bully as you are…but, judging from my comment I wasn’t bullying anyone- just offering my opinions and criticisms. After rereading your post its clear that you really hate people who have opinions that differ from your own. Get over it because everyone is entitled to an opinion and you can’t just start trying to beat people over the head with your little comments, replies to comments, and whole posts about these supposed ‘haters’!

        Hug a bear, talk to your mother, and learn to deal with the fact that not everybody is going to think the way you do. And, as I’ve learned in the past, you could have disabled the comments on this post so you would always go unchallenged.

        I’m not a bully, if anything I’m a victim that’s fighting back- and you, as a self admitted bully are preaching that you and all other bullies just need HELP? I see what the idea is- a bully that bullies just needs help, and the victims that try to fight back are being labeled bullies themselves. If this is a joke of yours, I don’t think its funny and you clearly haven’t found the help you so dearly need if at twenty-four you still think it’s okay to be like a bigger and older version of what can be found on the playground.

        What? Are you going to try and take away my milk money now?
        – Julia

      • Wow. Just wow. My opening to the reply was not directed at anyone and the fact that you took it that was just shows a lot of what your think about yourself. I was taking quotes that people use against bullies and placing them there. Which is why it followed up by asking if you could tell the difference as to whom they are directed at.

        As for the rest of what you’ve said, it seems you have an issue with listening to what other people have to say that’s against your own opinions. This is my blog and I’ll post what I want and reply with my own opinions. I am not here to seek your approval of my opinions.

        I was not bullying anyone in my original blog nor my reply to you. You took it that way because you’re butt hurt.

        Go hug a bear, get a drink, talk to your mom. Or Mort-a-whatever his name is. Maybe you can go relax in Arizona and write some. Take a chill pill and relax.

        Have a good one!

  2. Okay, see, here’s the deal, once and for all: get off the PC wagon. Bullying is a part of life. I grew up with it and, guess what? I’m a stronger person for having endured it. Should it be physical? Should people die from it? No on both counts.

    But Julia, you need to face reality: Bullying Is. Bullying always will be. And by taking the PC route, you are becoming a bully to the bullies. LIfe is all about strength and weakness. I get accused all the time of being cynical, but I say better cynical and not upset because the world doesn’t meet my PC expectations than to be able to give a knowing smile that, once more, the world has fallne to my expectations.

    I was in the Army. Would you call what a drill sergeant does bullying? In my day, they could still call you names and put you under all kinds of pressure. Why? Because there’s nothing they can do to you in boot camp that’ll be anywhere near as bad as combat. Their bullying saves lives and prepares you for what might happen as long as you’re in.

    I was bullied all through high school. I survived it and have a lot more confidence because of it. If we coddle the bullied, then they will forever remain weak. If we tolerate the bullying, then they will forever prey on the weak. Instead, why don’t we do this: as Jesi said, teach the bully to channel that agression in a more creative way, rather than bullying them in turn. Two wrongs do not make a right.

    As for the bullied, maybe they need to learn to stand up for themselves. When someone picks on me today—and not many do—because I survived childhood bullying and the Army, I can blow them off as the idiots they are. Or, more to the point, I have the confidence to stand up to them. Quite often, that changes the game in your favor.

    No matter how you candycoat it, life is about competition, and I don’t care how often PC police like Obama and his ilk say otherwise. We are falling behind the rest of the world in our educational system because we’re afraid that giving Little Johnny a test will be a blow to his confidence if he gets a lower grade than the student next to him.

    Bullies are gonna be there no matter how much we might wish otherwise. The human race is a competive, warlike race. It took that kind of agression to become the intelligent, dominant species we are.

    Bullies, by and large, aren’t cowards. A coward will back down when confronted. Most bullies won’t do that, no matter what the circumstances. Maybe you need to get your image of a real bully from real life instead of a movie or off a discussion group online, where everybody’s preaching to the choir.

    And if you think I’m picking on you, oh well. I’m tired of the PC movement and it’s lies. You deal with a situation by confronting it, not by having round table discussions about it. Want to stop bullying? Then stop bullying the bullies and give them something constructive to do.

  3. Oh, and newsflash: If you don’t like what Jesi says, DON’T READ IT!!! You seem to think that freedom of opinon only applies to you. Well, I gave four years of my life to this country, so I’d say I have more of a right to voice my opinion than you do.

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