I Can’t

Weight loss is hard. Writing is hard. As I’m prone to seeing, “if it were easy, everyone would do it.” And it’s true.

But I’ve learned some things, sitting here, staring at the blinking black line of the page, examining my life as I wait for something to strike me.

I’ve learned that I can’t do either of these things for someone else. I have to do them for me.

In the past, I’ve tried writing for other people. And I’ve done good with it. Writing for pay (Gaia gold, to be specific) worked nicely for me. I improved my writing. I became better at my craft while writing for others. Being pressed into writing because people think you can’t stick to it, well, that’s just a stupid thing to write for. I have to write for me.

Just like with weight loss. I can’t do it for a future lover (because if they love me, they’ll love me for everything I am, plus size or not). I can’t do it for a friend. I can’t do it for my mom. I have to do it for me. I have to want it for me and me alone.

I’ve always heard that “I can’t” is a phrase you should never use. But sometimes, you have to. Because sometimes you can’t. There is no changing it to “I can write for other people and not for myself.” Writing doesn’t work that way.

What are some other things you can’t do? (keep it a positive can’t. Or even a ‘I can’t whistle’ works, lol)


PS, if you’re interested, I have a second blog about costuming and cosplay. Check it out! Costume Me


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